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Our Hope, In the Ultimate One

Comet COVID:
Long predicted, yet first sightings lazily dismissed.
Rapidly gathering speed 
and magnitude;
Now hurtling, crazily, 
Zigzagging unstoppably, fizzing across the globe, and
Exploding, uninvited, unpredictably
Out of control – my control, your control
Anyone’s control….
God’s control?

A firework show 
Breaking unexpectedly over my world
Your world, 
Our world.
No escaping
Searing flames, flashes of white-hot danger, intense pain;
Inexplicably…. kaleidoscoped 
With moments of awesome colour, breath-taking beauty.
Kindness, generosity, 
Peace, hope and life.
Pointing to something (– someone?) 
More beautiful.
The ultimate 

You asked, so I’ll tell you….

I feel
Held down by the heavy ropes of guidelines and recommendations,
Like a straight jacket. 
Don’t…. don’t….
‘Don’t’ in danger of overshadowing the ‘do’s’ – 
Exercise time, a delicacy,
To be anticipated, savoured and re-lived.

I feel
In lockdown prison, world barred from the outside
Not allowed, prohibited.
And yet….
Cocooned inside, safe, secure, impenetrable.
Home, a cosy matchbox lined with feathers
For the delicate eggshell that is me.

I feel
Like an addict longing for the next injection
Of photos and video clips of our grandsons,
Babies growing up
In my phone,
At a distance.

I feel
Like an unrequited lover
Unable to consummate the relationship 
with our children and grandsons
With an embrace:
2m? 1m?
Both a painful chasm.
Clutching at the smiles,
Glimpsed shafts of communication…
That is what I crave.

I feel
Like an observer,
Watching dad wheeled in, 
Exhibit A, at visiting time….
Look, but don’t touch….
Almost together, but not quite,
Conversations through the Perspex;
Denied at most care homes.
Yet, hard to see as a privilege 
…and not a barrier.

My world.
Our world.
Your world.
How is it for you, my friend?
How does it make you feel?
Let us,
…we must…
….. we have to
Encourage each other,
Keep faith, 
Our hope,
In the ultimate

Written by Jenny who reads the Beacon of Hope from her home in England.

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